on may 9th only  (that's FRIDAYYYYYYYY)
you join one of my free affiliates, I give you free access for a month.   it's the same one I've been using for awhile though, so if you've already joined it within the last 3 months you won't be able to do this.  email me for the info'z and you do need a valid credit/bank card or whatever (for age verification only)
acamstar@gmail.c0m

facebook is like... FUUUCKEED up.    not that I care all that much, but any of the few times I've tried to use it the last few days, ummm yeah.  I really need to change some stuff on there but... yeah hahah.
so I blasted my heat last night.  and it's REALLY WARM TODAY.   ARGH.   bye bye money!  =(
I'm thinking of reopening my members site for pretty cheap passes cuz I'm gonna need some travel cash..... so if you've been interested in joining it, umm... keep an eye out.   It'll be a sweet deal... lol.  
I've been workin out like crazy today.  It feels goooooood!!  I need to buy a new bathing suit, ack!  that's totally girly shopping and I hate doing girly stuff.  hahah.   but I needez one...!  
hrmmm.......

well I've got a pretty freakin busy day so I'd better get goin in a minute.   I woke up at 6:45 today and went to the bakery where I got chai, an apricot croissant (MMMM omg), and a poppycream muffin.   and Addie came with me to help things along.  She and I have had a great morning together so far!  and it's only fuckin 10:30am!  wow.  yeah, getting up early sometimes can be really freakin awesome.

alrighty, laterz!

had a very relaxing day today..... most of it was spent being lazzzzy in bed....    Nick gave me one of his diazepams and told me to go back to sleep.... lol...  it's been a rainy, crappy day out.   that was around 10am...... I fell back to sleep, until being woken up again at 4pm.  hahah.  I don't even think I moved, unlike usual.  by the time I got up, I felt like I'd completely renewed myself.  haven't had such a restful sleep in ages.   I felt like it was fuckin first thing in the morning cuz it was still light around 5:30 - hard to believe most everyone else had already been halfway through their day.....

then warm yummy showertime, then a biggg bowl of Stagg chili & rice sprinkled with bacon for dinner, it fuckin hit the spottt.   hahah.

I decided, since it was absolutely fuckin freezing, to pamper myself today and jack up the heat.   It's really warm in here.  I'm about to run out of oil but at this point I guess I don't fuckin care man.  It's May now, HOPEFULLY I won't need to get any more oil cuz umm... I can't afford that right now hah.

my new tattoos are doing great,  they're really healing up pretty quick.   I went to the Purple Scorpion in Salem and got hooked up by their artist Jon.   he did some stuff for Powerglove so I got a couple of small things on my hands that I've been wanting -  some really meaningful stuff that I want close to me at all times.  They're starting to look really awesome and it was only done less than 36 hours ago.  He does awesome work and is a super nice dude, so if you're in New England you should definetely hit him up.
next up is my Scorpion... I'm gettin that sucker redone and doing it the right way ^.^    I just need to find the perfect looking one and then get me a ride and I'm good to go.   RAWR.

finally had to break down and buy a new phone over the weekend.  I love my SK2 but it finally just couldn't survive any longer.  There were all sorts of things going wrong with it, stuff that's been broken a long time... etc etc.  it wasn't holding a charge anymore.. .so yeah...  I got the fuckin sidekick lx....  MEHHH.   I suppose it's alright for the time being, but it was highly fuckin... WAY TOO overpriced.   I'm not even entirely impressed with it at the moment either, so I may just end up returning it.   I just couldn't wait any longer, though.  I want either the next iPhone or Google's upcoming device....     but those are still a ways off (although I hear the new iphone is only a couple months from now)  and I needed a new phone, now... so...  mehh.    yippieeee.

I feel so good and fuzzy and warm right now :)   I'm wearing my Dam sweater......... and sweatpants...    and I think I never fully woke up from my Valium sleep.... so I'm doing really good right now.   hehe.   It's been such a stress-free day and I've really fuckin needed some of that.  I'll probably continue to chill out, maybe find something to do but I'm kinda glad my plans for this evening fell through.  I'm enjoying my time much better right now.  It's just...  me time right now.  mmm lovely  :>

I was wide awake earlier, felt like I could potentially be up all night cuz of the vast amount of sleeeep I got (oh yeah, I had lots of dreams about fire.  lol.  wtf?) but I'm feeling almost like I could doze off again any minute now... so I think I'm good.  Must be the heat ^.^

oh yeah, and I got a new toy today from one of my favorite slavies.   It's a pink vibrator.    looks pretty hawt.  I think I might use it before bed.  hehehe.  If not, then I def will after I get home from work tomorrow and need some form of tension release  :)

alrighty.   here's one of my healing tattoo's!! :)



laterrrrrrzzz......

I hate to sound like a broken record, but do you know how much happier I'm going to be when I don't live in New England anymore?
god fuckin dammit man.  All I want is to be fuckin comfortable,  but that's way too much to ask around here.   way too much.
I'm not payin for fuckin oil in May, therefore I am freezing my ass off.
There were a few days in April that were so warm I was able to walked around naked and sleep sans clothing for 2 days AND have my fuckin windows open.   But you really can't bank on that sort of weather on anything of a regular basis until at least June, around here, and even then there are cold days.   you know, it fuckin snowed in June 3 years ago.
so I'm going to go bundle up to go to work now.   happy happy!!!!!!!!!!
this whole school thing is taking way too long =(
next winter I'm not staying around here dude.   I've already got plans to crash with friends in various WARM locations of the US.
alright.  later.

wow, he lived a long life....  

RIP, Albert <3


Albert Hofmann, 102

it's fuckin freezin again,  just as expected.
I refuse to put on more clothing right now so I turned the heat back on.  yay for spending more money on oil!     -.-
anywayz.  I haven't been writing in here as much, cuz I'm mostly writing for class and stuff.  I can't believe the semester's almost over again.  I don't even know what I'm taking in the fall yet.  I gotta meet with my counselor sometime soon..


*shivers*   goddamn fuckin new england.... !   I was happy bein naked last week, dammit.  COME BACK SUN!

well I just booked my flight to Oregon for the fuckin Powerglove & Dragonforce show.  hehe!! it's going to be fuckin awesome!!  I'd post the show details for anyone that lives out there... but it's already sold out.  1500 people motherfuckaaa!   omgz.   I can't wait.  :)   RAWR.  Then I think we're hittin up CA before heading back to crapsachusettes.    I've been dying to  go to CA for a few years now, so it's going to be awesome.  I hope to meet a lot of fans and sum mah CAMGIRL buddies who live out there.   :>  WEEE!!

alright, well, got a lot of stuff to do and then I need to go to the LIBERRY and write 8 pages or so.  I have noooo idea what I'm going to write about yet, so yeah.  I gotta go.  haha.  later!!    leave me comments dammit, my journal feels lonely!  :)

Lame weekened this is shaping up to be so far.   My plans for today got fucked up bigtime and now I'm out several hundred bucks and got nothin to do now either....  I'm trying to find something to do and not think about it since there's nothing I can do about it, but I'm having a hard time not being pissed off.  There's nothing quite like throwing away large sums of money for no reason.   this is actually the 2nd friday in a row I've done that too, although last week's wasnt as much...

ehh my fuckin head hurts =(   I'm stressed out.  I think I need to smoke copious amounts of pot or something.   kill some more brain cells, woo.
tomorrow's lookin like errand day since I haven't had any time for that in the last two weeks, and I gotta work on Sunday (which I guess is good, considering I really need the fuckin cash now).
so yeah... great weekend ahead.   I guess there's potential for tomorrow night not to blow, but we'll see.

at least as soon as I got the news earlier that I should go home, I was complimented on my baldness twice in a row on my way back.   the first came in the form of a crude male compliment from a homeless guy...  but then was one from a nice, middle aged black lady on the train.   she liked it a lot.  they both said it looked good on me; I wear it well.    that was nice.  I mean I know it does, that's why I've decided to keep it this way for a bit, now that its warm again (fucking finally) .... but it's always nice to be confirmed by another human being or two, every once in awhile.  and the vast contrast in the two humans it came from was pretty cool... there was something oddly satisfying about it....

 I'm also really fucking pissed off that I'm not seeing Children of Bodom tonight.  :(   This is probably gonna be the last time they'll play a decent set and I'm not going to fuckin be there.     I'd been looking forward to that :(   fuckin lame, and it's not even like I'm doing anything cool now instead.

well then. I'm gonna go find something to do and try to get rid of this insane urge to smash something.  I wish I was going up to see my friends tonight to have some more fun HATCHET TIME, right now, instead of next weekend.  grrrrrr.
.....

what a fucking lame ass goddamned Friday.   wow.

so I found this new networking site that apparently pays you to use it! I mean, not talking a ton of cash here but it seems that once you get started you can make a worthwhile amount of cash in a month. There are a lot of people on there already, too!
check it outtttt and fuckin hit me up on there. I want some friends to comment back and forth with, the more active you are on the site the more you get from them... :)

-----> check it!

I've been good about staying away from my computer for awhile.  Way too much time goes by as soon as I sit down in front of it; there are simply too many other things that need my attention more.  so yeah.  intranetz = badz!!    heh.   I have been getting some other things done, though, so w000ha.   I've finally got my compy back up and running, thanx to Mark, and my tax return, hahah.  mmmm new stuffs.



hehe.  thank the sweet lord - I have a huge part of my life back now.  My functionality involving a lot of different things was really fuckin suffering a LOTTTTTT.     mmmm gaming.   mmmm more media.  mmm video and music editing.  ooooh I can multitask again while having my streaming cam on.  hehe!  those are just a few in the longggg list of things that I missed during the 6 MONTHS I didn't have a good compy!  I can't believe so long went by, lol. 

and yeah, I understand this post completely contradicts itself.   but aside from having the new compy, I'm using a certain amount of restraint before I go plummeting headfirst back into cyber world  ^.^

it's finally starting to get nicer out (although the last 2 nights have been fuckin frigid... wtf)   and my soul is positively singinggggg.

semester's almost over, soon summer will take over, and I've got a lot of fuckin GOOOOOOOD shit planned out.   I'm going to fuckin California!!!   omgz!!!   finally!  lol.  Cali is pretty much the only place still within the US that I haven't been to yet and have been dying to go.   I can't fuckin wait.   =)

alright, that concludes my rambling for today.  I must get back to writing some of this novel  ;)
laterrrrrrrz!~~~~!!

Why someone on the fuckin bus yesterday had a BABY CRYING as their ringtone.  It went off twice during the ride.
Why the fuck would you CHOOSE to have something so horribly assaulting to your ears go off?  I mean sure, maybe it was a custom tone for one person or something, but WTF!!!  I wanted to fuckin punch this guy!!   lol

hahaha. check out my virtual chat bot. It's almost sorta like taking to me... the lite version, or somethin. I tried to program it with a decent amount of my own smartass answers ^.^ I've been getting some pretty fuckin amusing chat transcripts from it, I'll probably throw up some of the best ones at some point, hah.

Why Verizon continuously sends me, a fios customer for the last 6 months,  offers and "invitations" in the mail, for their amazing, LOW PRICED, fiber optic services.

.......what the fuck.

I am fuckin exhausted today.   The last few days have been full of drivingggggggg... and kissing.   lots of kissing. :)    oh, and some fuckin WALKING of course, too. My legz are sore from trekking around more often than usual.  I've really been pushing my already sore muscles there. My tongue's sore cuz of all the friction pushin against my jewelry in there.  ;)  my head's a little sore - maybe that's from the driving and being tired.  It's been like that for a couple of days now.
I dunno why but I just feel like I didn't sleep much at all last night, although it was a good, uninterrupted 7+ hours.  =/

wow, another time I've been really glad that livejournal auto-saves your entries as you're writing them, now.  (it didn't, back in the day)
cuz I just somehow hit a link to another page and lost what I was writing... but auto-restore brought it back.  yay!  heh.

I wish coffee was closer.  I need about 5 fuckin espresso shots right now, I think.  I'm seriously considering just going back up to bed for awhile....  shit.  
I was hoping to actually do something with my day today, but my head is totally out of it and my body is too.    GRAH.   I think maybe I caught someone's fuckin cold too, cuz I'm a little congested... my throat was kinda sore yesterday.
grrrrrrrr.

I hate when I finally have some time to myself and it gets fucked up by not feeling well, or by someone else comin along to take up all my time, or by spending all of it simply on doing online correspondance on stupid social networking sites and shit like that.

ah well.  *yawn*
I may just crawl back in to bed, after all.
meh!

hahah. yay! Darren from Arsis came to visit for 3 days... we partied it up, then on Sat was the fuckin Powerglove show with Peelander-Z!!! fucking amazing!!! The show sold out within 30 minutes... had to turn away a lot of peepz... sorry to anyone who came down and couldn't get in! the shit was off the CHAIN. Powerglove tore it up on fuckin stage, I dumped confetti all over EVERYONE while looking super freakin hawt, and PEELANDER was fuckin AMAZING. I've never seen such an awesome stage show.  TOTAL chaos and insanity the entire time!  and they were super nice guys, too!
At the bar I ran into one of my OLLLDDDEST internet buddies - one of the first I ever met on aol, actually, Tommy! fuckin craziness! He's a bartender at the ME now. fuckin sweeeet lol.

anyway, here's some fuckin awesome photos (thanx Zygore), there's a couple underneath from ANIME BOSTON which was also pretty fun... and then I gotta fuckin run out and do my homework... goddamn I've spent my entire fuckin morning and afternoon on the goddamn internet catching up and shit! crikies!!!!







the fuckin PINATASSSSS!!! hahaha




SEXY TIMEEEEEEEE!!!

CONFETTTIII!!!  hahaha


w0000t :D


yayayyy :D
PEELANDER!!!

hahahh, and here'z some pix from Anime Boston :)

*sniff sniff*
It was exactly 1 year ago today........
embarking upon an incredible journey, with 3 companions...
a life changing experience and an amazing eye-opener...

AMSTERDAM.

I miss it so much and want to go back sooo badly. But alas, money issues... trips to Europe are expensive....
so this year.... it's gonna be the fuckin TORONTO CUP in June. oh hell yeah. Toronto is the shit, and from what I hear, it's gotten a hell of a lot better since I was there 2 years ago!! hehe!!!

so tonight... will be quiet celebration in the memory of the Dam... (I've been bummed out all month, I sooo wish I could just... go back righhhhttt now haha) and for you.... a repost of the fuckin awesome photos I posted from last year: Amsterdam pixxxx


off to my mundane reality for now........

yeah, sleep has not been a very consistant theme lately. uggg. *rubs eyes*
I was literally dozing off during a meeting earlier, hehh.... bleghghh!! I'm at the comp lab atm, and going to head to Sbux pretty soon. I wish Sbux wasn't so damned expensive, it's burning a hole in my freakin pocket!! I need a Sbux slave, or something. ^.^

*yawn*


A woman thought I was 16, yesterday.
She was probably around 50ish herself, and was a customer who's stuff I'd been working on. We chit chatted a bit, and as usual, I was asked about if I went to school and all that other fuckin... just sooo ORIGINAL garbage.
When she was surprised at my age and told me I looked 16 "at most" I couldn't help but smile. I get that sort of reaction all the time from people, but hadn't heard a guess that low in a little while.
This made me particularly happy because of the way I looked at the time.
I was wearing completely normal clothing... my work uniform, and well... some really tall boots (which she couldnt see anyway)
I'm always under the assumption that a large part of what makes people think I'm a kid is 1) the way I dress sometimes and 2) my height, as I am not the tallest of persons, and could therefore still be a growing teenager for all they know.
But no... in these boots I'm around 5'10, pretty tall... and my clothing was absolutely normal, soooo... that means, she was just going off of my face, basically.
yay :D
I'm doing good. *smile*
I'm tryin anyway. been eating a bit better, shoppin at a fuckin Whole Foods now. I get like.. .half the fuckin groceries than a regular store cuz of the extreme price difference, but... hopefully it's worth it. heh.

well that was a few minutes worth of time so I think I'm going to mozy on over to Sbux now and get some retardedly expensive chai. I really could use a Sbux slave..... *raises eyebrow* ahem!

graghh, oh yeah... I have pics from St Patty's day, I gotta post those up next time when I have some more time.


some crapola from a draft:


I was not nervous as I stepped out of the room and onto the first set. The photographer was easy going, but had awful taste in music. When I voiced my discontent with his choice of music (some kind of rap which I’m sure any high school kid could have identified for me), he responded, “Oh, you’re into rock huh? Ok, how about some Jay-Z?”

I looked at him with disbelief of epic proportions. Had he REALLY just classified Jay-Z as rock?? To my extreme disappointment, the closest thing he had in his collection, was Linkin Park, whom I despised with a passion. I almost would have preferred the mainstream rap/pop music, but sadly, I knew that this was as good as it was going to get, and settled into the set to get to down to work.


cyaaaz!

haha fuck yeah, this was my st patty's day this year, went up to celebrate with ROB RITZ the director of God of Vampirez
it was a fuckin blast, ICE LUGEEEE and awesome fuckin bartender dude, much fun was HAD



ICE LUGEEEE!!! hahaha



Me n some girrrlieeezzz


Me n some boyyyeeeZ!!


hahaha this fuckin skull rocks!!!



fuck yeah dude. can't wait for the joint Smashing/Hatchet party we're throwing this summer!! :D

oh yeah.... there's just ONE DAY left to vote for me over in the FB models contest..... so go and do it plz!!
http://apps.facebook.com/fbmodels/welcome.php?vote_for=676630859
you can uninstall the app right after voting, if you wish.
thank you so much! <3